One of the causes for strain, stress, injury and
other maladies pianists, organists and typists experience is simply that
they press too hard into the keybed of their device or instrument.
Let's first take a look at sports and then physics (that HS subject you
think you don't use in real life).
As a baseball player stands
at home plate and the ball is hurtling toward him, he back-swings,
forward swings, hits the ball, then all the energy left over from the
swing dissipates into the follow through. The same action occurs when
an athlete swings a tennis racquet, kicks a ball, swings a golf club,
punches someone, throws a ball, etcetera. That is Newton's third law of
physics that every action has an equal and opposite action. In order
to forward swing, one must first back swing. Even when we walk forward,
as one leg is extending up and forward, the other leg is pushing
backward. So according to the laws of physics, in order to type or play
the piano down, one must first lift up. Many of us were trained or
taught to play or type from a resting and relaxed position which
actually creates tension because holding a position requires effort. So
we know that everything requires an opposite motion and a follow
through. I bet all you smart kids out there know exactly where I'm
going with this.
Now imagine that our baseball, tennis, soccer,
golf, football players or boxers are standing before a concrete wall and
they backswing then forward swing but instead of hitting an object and
following through, they strike the immovable wall. All the energy of
the swing, instead of following through and dissipating, ricochets back
into the athlete. That can hurt.
A piano is much the same.
Many pianists press into the keybed of a piano and not only does that
fail to produce any more of a tone but, all the energy of pressing down
is being transferred back up into their finger joints and tendons. We
often don't notice this until after an hour or so of practice or the
next morning when we wake up with stiff fingers. We are taught by bad
teachers "no pain, no gain." In this case, it is very much a lie. No
pain, no gain is fine when building muscle but not for bones, joints,
tendons, ligaments and certainly not for our technique. Often poor
technique, strain or missed notes are a result of what we are not doing
rather than what we are doing and often we are using the wrong muscles.
Sit
at any acoustic piano and very slowly, depress a key so you don't play a
sound. At some point you will hit a little bump in the action, then
press through it and you will hit the keybed. That little bump is the
point of sound once you actually play.
As a pianist drops the
controlled weight of their arm onto a key, they must use Newton's third
law. As they hit the point of sound, much like an athlete striking a
ball, they must then follow through without hitting the keybed. When
they press into the keybed, not only is their energy backfiring but,
they are pressing down and according to Newton, we can't set up for the
up motion if we are pressing down. This hinders technique. You can't
play down if you don't play up and you can't play up if you are pressing
down.
So, the key and cure to playing without tension or pain
is learning to play to the point of sound and simply following through
and not pressing into the keybed. Unbeknownst to most teachers, their
students press into the keybed. It is a motion that is often
invisible. When a student experiences problems with technique or pain,
the teacher often says practice more or run exercises to build strength
and endurance and the teacher is often oblivious that the way the
student practices is what needs to be addressed, not a clock.
Danger
Will Robinson. Before anyone tries to learn to play to the point of
sound, there are other components of technique which must first be in
place. This includes controlling arm weight, controlling up/down,
controlling in/out from the shoulder and elbow, using the fulcrum of the
elbow, controlling rotation of the forearm through the use of the
pronator and supinator muscles. Likewise, there are movements to avoid
such as abduction, curling the thumb under the palm, isolating a finger,
equalizing fingers, radial and ulnar deviation, and trying to play too
relaxed, still and quiet.
A virtuoso technique looks like it is
effortless and relaxed. That is true, the fingers are relaxed because
the arm does all the work. Observers are often looking at the pianist's
hands and fail to notice the elbow and arm is actually doing most of
the work. Pianists who attempt to play from the fingers and have
fatigue, are told to relax so, they relax the same muscles they are
continuing to use and they achieve nothing.
Once all of the
proper motions are achieved and the improper ones eradicated, point of
sound will just happen. Some "techniques" such as the Russian Technique,
surreptitiously imbue the pianist with these movements but personally, I
would rather learn the physics and ergonomics of movement rather than
being tricked through mindless imitation. Although, it works to some
degree. Where it fails is when a pianist encounters a passage they can't
execute and if they knew the mechanics of the arm, would be able to
figure out what sort of adjustment is required to play that passage.
I
once studied with a leading concert pianist in my area who didn't know
what he was doing but had a phenomenal natural technique. His
instruction to me was to watch him play then imitate his motion. That
would have been fine but I already had bad habits hardwired into my
brain which were getting in the way. Since he didn't know anything
about ergonomics nor physics, he had no idea how to fix me other than
prescribing "practice more."
I once gave a lecture on this topic
and a pianist disagreed with me about Newtons third law citing that the
piano is down, not up. The finger must come straight down onto a key.
If the pianist is playing with a "still and quiet hand" and they must
also play black keys, note that the black keys are higher than the
white keys. This results in the still and quiet pianist to stretch or
twist to reach those keys which in turn create vector forces or, two
muscles pulling one bone in two directions simultaneously. This creates
tremendous imbalance in the arm which controls the hand and fingers and
this leads to an incoordinate technique. Keep in mind your fingers
have no muscles. They are moved by the flexor muscles in your forearm
so that is where the pianist must first play from.
If you were
to walk up stairs, your ascending leg would lift HIGHER than the next
stair, then come straight down onto it. If you tried to walk upstairs
without lifting your foot higher than the step, you'd trip. Playing the
piano is the same. We must use the larger muscles of the arm to get
the fingers higher than the notes we are desirous to play. Of course as
we become more efficient, we minimize the height but make no mistake,
although it may appear invisible, it is still there. Hanon knew this and
prescribed the pianist to isolate one finger and lift it high but, this
isolation engages the flexors and extensors at the same time resulting
in strain to the long flexor tendons which leads to median nerve
entrapment (AKA carpal tunnel syndrome). Remember the arm, hand and
fingers can only move in one direction at a time. By abducting, for
instance, the hand gets pulled in two or four directions despite the
pianist trying to play a passage in a specific direction.
I have
no conclusion to this post other than don't try this at home. Find a
teacher who knows what a pronator and abductor is and work from there.
Monday, April 30, 2018
Saturday, March 24, 2018
Musicians Warming Up
Every once in a while I come across a piano teacher or musician who think that they need to stretch their hands or run scales to "warm up." The myth behind warming up is that you are able to isolate a body part such as the hands and move them to warm them up. If that were true, the blood that you think you warm up in your hands while moving them, because of circulation, doesn't stay there. It circulates throughout the rest of the body meaning "cold" blood is coming back into the hands. Furthermore, you are not warming up the blood or muscles, the blood is already at its maximum temperature. The real issue is circulation.
A danger in moving cold hands or other body parts is that the elasticity of the muscles and tendons are compromised because they are in a contracted state and if you try to move cold body parts fast, you can cause damage to the tissue such as micro tears and pulls to either the muscles or the tendons. Slow movement and in the medium range of motion is always advised when the extremities are cold.
When the body is cold, the blood is kept near the core vital organs and circulation is slowed to the extremities such as the hands and feet. That makes our hands and fingers feel cold and stiff. Stretching is not a solution and our teachers and coaches have been teaching this mistruth about stretching for years.
When you stretch beyond the mid range of motion you are creating micro tears in the muscle tissue or tendons and the body's response is to rush blood to that site to both immobilize and repair the damage. This process gives us the sensation of "warming up" when in reality we are damaging our tissue structures. Whenever we move, we must only move as far as the mid range of motion, not the extreme where we will stretch, tear and damage tissue.
There are actually two categories of muscle, fast twitch and slow twitch. Musicians should take the time to learn which ones are which and how to utilize them in their craft. Even so, forcing fast twitch muscles to move fast or to stretch them when they are cold and in their contracted state could damage them. Think of your muscles as being like warm gravy. The gravy can easily pour out of the bowl when it is warm. Now put the bowl in the fridge for half an hour and note that it no longer pours fluidly. You can't just run a spoon through the gravy to warm it up, it needs to come out of the fridge and be warmed totally.
If you have a teacher or coach who prescribes stretching and isolation exercises to warm up the body, find another teacher. It is not their fault that they have been given erroneous information themselves from their own teachers, but, their ignorance on the subject can cause you permanent damage. Ignorance is not bliss if it results in tendon, nerve or muscular disorders. That is like going to a mechanic who says that your tires are bald but you can probably get away on them for another few months. He may be the best mechanic in the world but he is risking your life.
If one wishes to truly warm up the body and consequently the hands, one needs to sit in a warm room so that the whole body warms up, not just the part they are going to use. Another solution is to do some mild whole body movement to get the blood pumping throughout the circulatory system.
There are mini steppers on the market for under $50 that a musician can take to a gig with them and use in the green room before a performance. After doing twenty minutes or about 2,000 steps on one of those, the blood will be circulating efficiently throughout the whole body and one may even break a small sweat. You won't have to warm up your legs because you've already been walking all day and, movement that is well known such as walking is as simple as the brain turning on and off a switch. One doesn't need to warm up to remember how to ride a bike. The brain just knows what to do, like flicking a switch.
Conditioning is important, too. If you can only do three minutes on the stair stepper before fatigue sets in then you're not going to achieve a full body warm up in that amount of time so, it would behoove you to do this every day so the body is conditioned to work at that level without fatigue. One doesn't want to go on stage exhausted and weak. It is also advised to be hydrated before, during and after this simple body warm up procedure.
I'll not endorse any particular brand but you can find mini steppers on Ebay, tax and shipping free. Read the user reviews on Amazon to find a brand you think you can trust.
Every once in a while I come across a piano teacher or musician who think that they need to stretch their hands or run scales to "warm up." The myth behind warming up is that you are able to isolate a body part such as the hands and move them to warm them up. If that were true, the blood that you think you warm up in your hands while moving them, because of circulation, doesn't stay there. It circulates throughout the rest of the body meaning "cold" blood is coming back into the hands. Furthermore, you are not warming up the blood or muscles, the blood is already at its maximum temperature. The real issue is circulation.
A danger in moving cold hands or other body parts is that the elasticity of the muscles and tendons are compromised because they are in a contracted state and if you try to move cold body parts fast, you can cause damage to the tissue such as micro tears and pulls to either the muscles or the tendons. Slow movement and in the medium range of motion is always advised when the extremities are cold.
When the body is cold, the blood is kept near the core vital organs and circulation is slowed to the extremities such as the hands and feet. That makes our hands and fingers feel cold and stiff. Stretching is not a solution and our teachers and coaches have been teaching this mistruth about stretching for years.
When you stretch beyond the mid range of motion you are creating micro tears in the muscle tissue or tendons and the body's response is to rush blood to that site to both immobilize and repair the damage. This process gives us the sensation of "warming up" when in reality we are damaging our tissue structures. Whenever we move, we must only move as far as the mid range of motion, not the extreme where we will stretch, tear and damage tissue.
There are actually two categories of muscle, fast twitch and slow twitch. Musicians should take the time to learn which ones are which and how to utilize them in their craft. Even so, forcing fast twitch muscles to move fast or to stretch them when they are cold and in their contracted state could damage them. Think of your muscles as being like warm gravy. The gravy can easily pour out of the bowl when it is warm. Now put the bowl in the fridge for half an hour and note that it no longer pours fluidly. You can't just run a spoon through the gravy to warm it up, it needs to come out of the fridge and be warmed totally.
If you have a teacher or coach who prescribes stretching and isolation exercises to warm up the body, find another teacher. It is not their fault that they have been given erroneous information themselves from their own teachers, but, their ignorance on the subject can cause you permanent damage. Ignorance is not bliss if it results in tendon, nerve or muscular disorders. That is like going to a mechanic who says that your tires are bald but you can probably get away on them for another few months. He may be the best mechanic in the world but he is risking your life.
If one wishes to truly warm up the body and consequently the hands, one needs to sit in a warm room so that the whole body warms up, not just the part they are going to use. Another solution is to do some mild whole body movement to get the blood pumping throughout the circulatory system.
There are mini steppers on the market for under $50 that a musician can take to a gig with them and use in the green room before a performance. After doing twenty minutes or about 2,000 steps on one of those, the blood will be circulating efficiently throughout the whole body and one may even break a small sweat. You won't have to warm up your legs because you've already been walking all day and, movement that is well known such as walking is as simple as the brain turning on and off a switch. One doesn't need to warm up to remember how to ride a bike. The brain just knows what to do, like flicking a switch.
Conditioning is important, too. If you can only do three minutes on the stair stepper before fatigue sets in then you're not going to achieve a full body warm up in that amount of time so, it would behoove you to do this every day so the body is conditioned to work at that level without fatigue. One doesn't want to go on stage exhausted and weak. It is also advised to be hydrated before, during and after this simple body warm up procedure.
I'll not endorse any particular brand but you can find mini steppers on Ebay, tax and shipping free. Read the user reviews on Amazon to find a brand you think you can trust.
stair stepper, warming up, pianist, musician, stretching, piano, malcolm kogut, tendonitis, hand, injury,
Thursday, February 9, 2017
Rivers Casino Schenectady, Opening Day
I attended the opening day and got in line one hour
before the opening (12:00) and stayed until about 8:00 p.m. There were
many pluses and minuses but overall it was a good experience. Here are
my plus and minus: It is in Schenectady, ten minutes from my house.
Otherwise I'd have to travel to Saratoga about 45 minutes away. It was
neat, clean and bright. There were a couple dozen gas heaters outside
(I helped pay for them) which I didn't think was necessary. Even though
they could afford it, there is no reason to squander natural
resources. They could have decorated the place with energy saving
spotlights or something. Be good neighbors and give the money to the
local homeless shelter instead.
There didn't seem to be any festive ceremony anywhere where I was so I missed that. C'mon, a cymbal crash or something.
The
staff was plentiful, cheerful and eager to assist IF you approached
them. Nine hours there and only one staff member walk by and ask me how
I was doing and if I was enjoying myself. There were two staff members
who were VERY rude and if I were the boss, they'd be fired on the spot.
At another time I saw a kitchen staff type person walk through the
floor carrying a platter of clean glasses to the bar. They need to take
a lesson from the Victorian mansion millionaires and build passageways
for the staff so they are never seen and stuff just magically appears.
The
place is smaller than the Saratoga Racino but has the additional
attraction of about a hundred tables. Real ones. They were always
packed. Some of the table dealers were still trying to figure stuff
out. I saw one of them user their fingers at one point. That cute.
They'll get it. The tables are a big plus.
Many of the slots are labeled as
penny slots. NOT SO. Most of them have a minimum bet of forty cents.
Saratoga has real penny slots so you can dispense with that 19 cents you
have left when you leave. When you add lines and multiply the bet, one
play could cost you ten bucks. Penny slot my . . . . Also, none of
the machines take dollars. Five is the minimum. I arrived with all my
stripper money.
In some casinos, when someone wins
big, such as $700, $2,000 or $10,000 they congratulate that person over
the loud speakers and a rumble echoes through the room. Not here. I think it is exciting to hear that someone is winning.
They need non-player seating.
Unless you are at the bar or on a machine, there is no place to sit
waiting for your addicted sister to finish up losing her money. I saw people sitting on
the floor only to be told that they have to get up. Keep in mind that
three quarters of their clientele are elderly. They often need to
rest. Quit nickel and diming. Park benches would have been nice
outdoors too where many elderly people were waiting for their rides or
cabs. Put a bench where all those useless heaters are.
There
was a piano player in one of the lounges that no one was listening to.
My big complaint here was that he was playing a dull electric piano
coming through muffled speakers. Have some class and put in a real baby
grand piano. Make the top a bar. This was unacceptable. Some casinos
have piano players in the entrance hallway where they are playing real
pianos. You can mike them. The band in the other bar was excellent but
too loud. About 110 decibels on my phone app. The ambient room was
about 80 - 90 with spikes. If you have sensitive hearing, bring plugs.
Once your hearing nerves are killed by loud noise, they're gone
forever. Do you have ringing? That is the sound of dead nerves.
NO
BUFFET? WHAT THE . . . . ? I met a friend there and he said that two
burgers and a drink cost him THIRTY DOLLARS. So we left for dinner and
went to a local establishment which was empty. When we came back, the
police cordoned off that gawd-awful circle. I'd fire that architect.
The police were not allowing anyone to go around the circle so you had
to go straight and do a U-turn in the middle of the busy Eerie Blvd -
which many people did. The police are not that stupid, are they? If
anything they should have treated it like an intersection and just had
four cops let people through one lane at line at a time. After dodging
U-turners and people cutting across four lanes, we entered the casino
property to be sent to the garage. We had a handicap pass and told the
attendant that we wanted handicap parking and he said there was none.
We told him we were just there and there were many open spaces. After
arguing, he let us through and we parked right in front of the door.
The parking people need to communicate. They had the egress to many of
the lot lanes chained off. I don't know why because it forced
people to back out while others were trying to get in . . . it was just a
mess. They need to work their parking kinks out. I'm sure once the
fad of a new casino goes away, the lot will be more controllable but
please, put people first. Have someone monitoring the lots and radio in
empty spaces if you have to. You can afford to hire one guy simply by getting
rid of those outdoor heaters.
Speaking of people, a
lot of the younger gamblers there can be quite rude. I waited behind a
guy for about twenty minutes to get his machine when he was done
losing. When he got up a woman three machines down said "I HAVE DIBS ON
THAT MACHINE." I said "You're playing that machine." She replied that
she would be done in five minutes. I just sat down and started
playing. People also put coats and cell phones on seats to save them.
Also, spouses sit in seats while not playing but are watching the person
next to them play. We need those benches.
I walked
past an actor type person who tapped me on the shoulder with a
clipboard. It was funny, ha ha, I noticed them. BUT, the person I was
with just had rotator cuff surgery. Had he been on the inside . . .
LAWSUIT. Look but don't touch.
I suspect
construction was done hastily. I found a loose screw, a loose baseboard
and saw a dangling light fixture. The bathrooms, BTW, at least the
men's room, they were very nice, clean and spacious. I loved the doors
to the stalls. Give that designer a raise.
Most of
our society doesn't really beleive in God. That's okay, they will on
their deathbeds. I couldn't get over how many people, YOUNG people, go
through superstitious rituals and routines before playing. They kiss
their fingers then touch the screen, they pile trinkets and statues on
the machines, they rub down the screen, some even recite some banal
mumbo jumbo. BTW, their "gods" are not helping them out very much, they all lost anyway.
Maybe they should turn to the original one who will at least try to
convince them instead of gambling, take the kids camping or to mini golf.
So, overall, it is a great casino that I
have no doubt will iron out its kinks as its new smell wears off. I will
definitely go back but may hit the Racino every once in a while for the
real penny slots and buffet. This is indeed a gem to Schenectady.
I
know some people think it is going to attract crime. I know like, all
those seventy and eighty year olds, they come with their crime, their
drugs and their rapists . . . .
Monday, January 30, 2017
Amazfit Pace compared to Garmin Vivofit and Map My Hike
I've
been researching wearable trackers and have been looking at three
products which all boast the same relative features: Fenix 3HR ($479),
TomTom Adventurer ($349) and the Amazfit Pace ($159). You can find a 20%
or 30% discount on retailmenot.com for the Pace. The Amazfit is new on
the market. It premiered in China mid 2016 and in the USA on January
of 2017. I was interested in the Pace because of it's price.
Especially if it did everything I wanted and at a third of the price
with a discount. There is a lot of misinformation about the Amazfit
Pace online, I suspect because it is still new or its competitors are
trolling it. Here is some of the incorrect data out there;
"It is only in Chinese" - only if you purchase the Chinese version. Buy the USA version (Pace) if you want it in English.
"It is only in metric." The Pace is in Imperial.
"It
is only in military time." Some of its native clock faces are in 24
hour time, others are in 12 hour time. There are 13 faces to choose
from and it is too bad they can not be customized or utilize third party
apps. Maybe they will change this in the future with an update.
"It
does not have breadcrumbing or altitude features." It does. When you
begin a workout, you can choose from RUN, WALK, INDOOR RUN or TRAIL
RUN. I beleive the altitude gauge only displays in TRAIL RUN mode.
Breadcrumb is also in TRAIL RUN, you just have to scroll to the bottom
screen for it.
I have two friends, one
with the Fenix 3 and the other with Ambit 3. Then next time we go hiking
together, I will do a more detailed comparison. For now, I performed a
simple test of the Amazfit Pace, my Garmin Vivofit and the Android app
Map My Hike. Here is the comparison data. I walked two blocks in an
area surrounded by houses and trees.
Heart Rate: The Pace utilizes a PPG heart rate sensor while my Vivofit uses an ECG heart rate chest strap sensor. ECG is regarded to be more accurate while PPG is good for averages.
First check: Pace 73, Vivofit 70, my finger 68. My peak heart rate was listed: Pace 156, Vivofit 108.
First check: Pace 73, Vivofit 70, my finger 68. My peak heart rate was listed: Pace 156, Vivofit 108.
Steps: Pace 967, Garmin 989.
Maximum speed: Pace 4.14 mph, Map My Hike: 4.1 mph
Calories burned: Pace 36, Map My Hike 56, Garmin 46.
Mileage:
Pace .43 miles, Map My Hike .43 (I forgot to mark my Garmin but it is
not GPS and I'm sure would be a little more based upon more steps).
Sleep.
Neither is particularly accurate because I watched an hour of TV in bed
before going to sleep and watched about an hour when I woke up.
Deep sleep: Pace 2 hours and 21 minutes. Garmin 4 hours and 42 minutes.
Total sleep: Pace 8:39, Garmin 9:09
As
you can see from the attached pictures, neither my phone nor the Pace
were very accurate but, I will blame that on the houses and trees.
Maybe I need to recalibrate both or walk faster. Both were very
accurate when I tested them while driving. The Pace tracks both Russian
(GLONASS) and USA satellites and picks them up very fast.
The
third photo is of the GPS tracking feature. In some wearables, this is
called "Breadcrumb." For me, this is a valuable feature because I
wander off trail sometimes and using this "map," it will help me find my
way back.
It is also worth noting that
one can get the Noom Walk app for a pedometer, Map My Hike for mapping
and Altitude for a compass and just use your phone for the same relative
data.
Who knows which one of these tools
are the most accurate. If you use them to relatively and consistently
track your own data, you can get a good measure of your activities and
metrics.
A mark of a good company is that they give
ownership of their product to their customers and clients. I hope Huami
Amazfit will make their product available to third parties so that
customers can customize their own workout metrics, watch faces and app
export. Right now the Pace only works with Strava.
I
don't like how the Pace is propitiatory to a phone and does not work on
its own. Once activated though, you don't need to carry the phone
around and, the pairing was a little confusing and not at all like the
demo videos online.
The transflective screen is excellent outside in the sunlight. Not so much indoors.
Push notifications work very well and instantly. Those are very much customizable.
Pace:
So,
would I buy an Amazfit Pace? I don't know yet. For sure, they give
"the big boys" a run for their money so the big boys better take
notice.
Wednesday, January 4, 2017
A better send-off than wretched 2016 deserved
Songs to Amuse, Steamer No. 10 Theatre, Dec. 31
Keyboardist Malcolm Kogut and singer Byron Nilsson (aka B.A. Nilsson in these pages) brought their cabaret act Songs to Amuse to the stage at Steamer No. 10 Theatre on New Year’s Eve, where a happy crowd heartily laughed at a two-hour (including intermission) program of (mostly) 20th-century songs intended to, as advertised, amuse.
They began with “Lydia the Tattooed Lady,” which was originally introduced in a 1939 movie by Groucho Marx, and widely known now thanks to Kermit the Frog’s version. It’s a pun-filled, slightly salacious chronicle of one woman’s varied and outlandish body art, and as an opener, a pretty good indication of what was to come. Written by Harburg and Arlen around the same time they were composing the songs for The Wizard of Oz, Nilsson also told the story of–and sang–a lyric excised by a studio exec out of concern that it would “date” the number. The line? “When she sits, she sits on Hitler.”
What was the thing with everyone underestimating Hitler’s long-term prospects?
And that was the show: Smart, varied musical approaches by Kogut, fine singing and snappy patter by Nilsson. There were songs by Noel Coward and Tom Lehrer (the latter allowing Kogut to add a little synthesized Irish fiddle); songs made famous by the likes of Al Jolson (“Why Do They All Take The Night Boat to Albany”) and Blossom Dearie (Dave Frishberg’s “My Attorney Bernie”); a trio of thoroughly delightful numbers written by the Brit duo Flanders and Swann; and many more.
Nilsson even tossed out a couple of lines from DeSylva, Brown and Henderson’s “Turn On the Heat,” one of the more demented songs from that most demented year of Hollywood musicals, 1929.
Particularly enjoyable was the woe-filled (as opposed to woeful) temperance ballad, “Father’s a Drunkard and Mother Is Dead.” This horrible tale of 19th-century death and abandonment provided the opportunity for a jaunty sing-along. The duo helpfully included the lyrics to the refrain on the back of the program: “Mother, oh! Why did you leave me alone/With no one to love me, no friends and no home?/Dark is the night, and the storm rages wild/God pity Bessie, the Drunkard’s lone child!”
While there was no happy ending for “Bessie,” we in the audience had a fine time singing about her misery.
As the second half of the program wound down, the duo saved something special for the end: the 1937 labor ballad, “Capitalistic Boss.” This rich bastard’s lament gave Nilsson a chance to tear into a life of greed, exploitation, indolence, political violence and selfishness with an angry glee, as the narrator continually returned to one line of defense: “Something is wrong with my brain.”
The evening ended with everyone joining in on “Auld Lang Syne.” Kogut and Nilsson sent us out into the cold with warmer spirits than when we arrived, and ready to enjoy whatever revelry the last three hours of 2016 had in store.
http://thealt.com/2017/01/02/
Keyboardist Malcolm Kogut and singer Byron Nilsson (aka B.A. Nilsson in these pages) brought their cabaret act Songs to Amuse to the stage at Steamer No. 10 Theatre on New Year’s Eve, where a happy crowd heartily laughed at a two-hour (including intermission) program of (mostly) 20th-century songs intended to, as advertised, amuse.
They began with “Lydia the Tattooed Lady,” which was originally introduced in a 1939 movie by Groucho Marx, and widely known now thanks to Kermit the Frog’s version. It’s a pun-filled, slightly salacious chronicle of one woman’s varied and outlandish body art, and as an opener, a pretty good indication of what was to come. Written by Harburg and Arlen around the same time they were composing the songs for The Wizard of Oz, Nilsson also told the story of–and sang–a lyric excised by a studio exec out of concern that it would “date” the number. The line? “When she sits, she sits on Hitler.”
What was the thing with everyone underestimating Hitler’s long-term prospects?
And that was the show: Smart, varied musical approaches by Kogut, fine singing and snappy patter by Nilsson. There were songs by Noel Coward and Tom Lehrer (the latter allowing Kogut to add a little synthesized Irish fiddle); songs made famous by the likes of Al Jolson (“Why Do They All Take The Night Boat to Albany”) and Blossom Dearie (Dave Frishberg’s “My Attorney Bernie”); a trio of thoroughly delightful numbers written by the Brit duo Flanders and Swann; and many more.
Nilsson even tossed out a couple of lines from DeSylva, Brown and Henderson’s “Turn On the Heat,” one of the more demented songs from that most demented year of Hollywood musicals, 1929.
Particularly enjoyable was the woe-filled (as opposed to woeful) temperance ballad, “Father’s a Drunkard and Mother Is Dead.” This horrible tale of 19th-century death and abandonment provided the opportunity for a jaunty sing-along. The duo helpfully included the lyrics to the refrain on the back of the program: “Mother, oh! Why did you leave me alone/With no one to love me, no friends and no home?/Dark is the night, and the storm rages wild/God pity Bessie, the Drunkard’s lone child!”
While there was no happy ending for “Bessie,” we in the audience had a fine time singing about her misery.
As the second half of the program wound down, the duo saved something special for the end: the 1937 labor ballad, “Capitalistic Boss.” This rich bastard’s lament gave Nilsson a chance to tear into a life of greed, exploitation, indolence, political violence and selfishness with an angry glee, as the narrator continually returned to one line of defense: “Something is wrong with my brain.”
The evening ended with everyone joining in on “Auld Lang Syne.” Kogut and Nilsson sent us out into the cold with warmer spirits than when we arrived, and ready to enjoy whatever revelry the last three hours of 2016 had in store.
http://thealt.com/2017/01/02/
Thursday, December 22, 2016
Lessons and Carols for Small Churches
Lessons and Carols for Small Churches
Someone asked for a hymn based lessons and carols format for churches with small or no choir. Here is a template of one that I have used in the past.
Welcome
Entrance Hymn "Oh Come, All Ye Faithful"
Opening Prayer
"O Little Town of Bethlehem"
First Lesson Genesis 3:8-5, 17-19
"Once In Royal David's City"
Second Lesson Isaiah 11:1-3a, 4a-9
"Away In A Manger"
Third Lesson Luke 1:26-38
"The Snow Lay On The Ground"
Fourth Lesson Luke 2:1-7
"Angels From the Realms of Glory"
Fifth Lesson Luke 2:8-16
"What Child Is This"
Sixth Lesson Matthew 2:1-12
"We Three Kings"
Seventh Lesson John 1:1-14
"Silent Night"
Blessing
Recessional "Angels We Have Heard On High"
Other carols to consider: "Joy To The World," "I Heard the Bells On Christmas Day," "Lo, How A Rose E're Blooming," "Hark! The Herald Angels Sing," any Advent hymn or, you can substitute any solo or a choral anthem the choir is working on.
Someone asked for a hymn based lessons and carols format for churches with small or no choir. Here is a template of one that I have used in the past.
Welcome
Entrance Hymn "Oh Come, All Ye Faithful"
Opening Prayer
"O Little Town of Bethlehem"
First Lesson Genesis 3:8-5, 17-19
"Once In Royal David's City"
Second Lesson Isaiah 11:1-3a, 4a-9
"Away In A Manger"
Third Lesson Luke 1:26-38
"The Snow Lay On The Ground"
Fourth Lesson Luke 2:1-7
"Angels From the Realms of Glory"
Fifth Lesson Luke 2:8-16
"What Child Is This"
Sixth Lesson Matthew 2:1-12
"We Three Kings"
Seventh Lesson John 1:1-14
"Silent Night"
Blessing
Recessional "Angels We Have Heard On High"
Other carols to consider: "Joy To The World," "I Heard the Bells On Christmas Day," "Lo, How A Rose E're Blooming," "Hark! The Herald Angels Sing," any Advent hymn or, you can substitute any solo or a choral anthem the choir is working on.
Saturday, November 26, 2016
My Quora answer to What are hindrances and obstacles to church growth?
First
and foremost is that society doesn’t beleive in the church institution
anymore. Churches are not called to grow but to serve. When they
serve, they begin to grow. People are not dumb, they can recognize an
insincere church right off the bat. They can discern which ones are ice
cold, lukewarm or red hot. Most are lukewarm and that is their
problem. They won’t grow if they are lukewarm.
Every church has it own challenges and obstacles. Most of the time the hindrances are the people themselves. Growth comes from many avenues: good preaching, good music, a welcoming community, location, parking, energy level, comfortable space, social opportunities, service opportunity and consistency.
A church once asked me to give them ideas to help promote growth and I gave them a list of 18 activities that they could easily organize over the course of a year. They said “I don’t like that one.” “This one isn’t something that fits our community.” “We don’t want to attract those kind of people.” and “Who is going to do all this?” I told them that energy begets energy, that they must incorporate people of all generational, cultural, economic and educational levels into a comprehensive program and, even if they start small they will grow. They whittled the list down to three and then they didn’t even do those three. Survival of the fittest. Not to act is to act.
I think the church needs to be offering the community at least one activity or event each week. Even if the unchurched community is not interested in every topic, at least they will see that this church is active and vibrant and may decide to give it a chance.
I took a church with three services a weekend and after fifteen years we grew to five services and two of them were SRO. There was no one thing that promoted the growth rather a sinuous network of everything. Everything was comprehensive. We got rid of youth, teen and adult choirs and evolved to a family choir. The youth groups didn’t do their own youthy things but rather plugged into all the ministries of the community and church with the adults. Our music too became comprehensive and we did away with the folk group, the traditional choir and the praise band. We did all styles of music at every service and no group owned a particular service.
My suggestions for a church looking to grow are three things; Pastors, get out of your office. Jesus didn’t keep office hours. Get out and be with the people. Establish a beat like the old timey police officer. Regularly visit diners, bars, clubs, senior centers, nursing homes, jails, courts, be seen and heard. Approach people and be approachable and wear your collar. Don’t do it to drum up business, do it to comfort, heal, serve and welcome. Go to the mall, sit on one of the sofas in the hallway and put out a sign, “I will talk to anyone about anything.” Pass out your card for further ministering and don’t worry about your homily. If these things you do, the homily will take care of itself.
Hire a music director who does not worship music, one where music is not his ministry but someone who loves people and music is the vehicle to ministering to them. This person needs to spend time with the staff to come up with creative and diverse ideas and programs and know how to delegate lovingly and compassionately. The children of Israel were taken as slaves of the Babylonians and the musicians were forced to entertain their captors but they refused and hid their instruments in the trees by the river. The Babylonians said play or we will smash your babies against the rocks and they still refused. Likewise, a true music minister needs to know when to put down their instrument and minister. Their job isn’t an hour on Sunday morning. It begins when the service is over and ends the following Sunday when they pick up their instruments to worship - not entertain.
Finally, as I said before, lots and lots and lots and lots of events and activities. One activity can grow into something big. I once played weekly organ recitals at noon on a weekday. We started with about 20 people and after a year there were about 200 in attendance. They didn’t come for the music, they came because it was the place to be. My choir started bringing in refreshments. The parolees in the shelter next door came for the refreshments. A home for disabled adults started busing in residents to get them out of the facility. Homeless people came in out of the cold. The parolees began ushering at the door and cleaning up afterward. The homeless began passing out flyers in the community. Pastors, choir members and organists came to network. Brides came to scope out the building. A police officer came in regularly to chat with the parolees to see what he could do for them. Eventually the parolees started to use the building during the day for their AA and NA meetings. The place was a beehive of activity and people started visiting the church because - something was going on there. As the psalmist foretells in Psalm 66: Come and see what God has done: he is awesome in his deeds toward the children of man.
There is another thing, the church needs to give back to the community. It needs to do something that makes a difference. It needs to do several things that make a difference. People want to be part of something that makes a difference, not just sit in a pew and be entertained. When people visit or join the church, have ministries they can immediately plug into and I don’t mean things like altar guild, choir, usher or woman’s club. Things like working the food pantry, prison ministry, mission trips, gun buyback programs, homeless shelter, or do something revolutionary like Canada’s safe injection center (drug users can go there to shoot up without fear of arrest but medical care and counseling is provided in case something goes wrong. These centers have never had anyone die of an overdose while blocks away, people die from overdoses alone and unaided, hmmmph - do something revolutionary and save lives or not?), and, the church needs to tithe to some big program like California’s Housing Works program where they give houses to the homeless. Yup, GIVE. It gets them off the street and gives them stable shelter. A homeless person can cost your county about $20,000 a year in medical care alone because they lack shelter. With shelter and a place to secure a job from, they will be healthier. Dollar for dollar, homeless shelters are not cost effective on the whole and are only a band-aid. Check them out: housingworksca.org. Start one in your community.
Too bad the church can’t focus on some of these problems rather than worrying about growth and paying the bills. Pew people are not “customer acquisitions,” they are saints in the making. Too bad we don’t have institutions that fostered that growth and marshaled those forces. Oh, we do. It is called the DSS. They take care of the poor, the hungry, the homeless, the hopeless, the dying, the lonely, the abandoned, the imprisoned, the evicted, the illegal, the incurable, the different, the despised, the abused, the addicted, the forgotten, the neglected, the invisible, the battered and the frightened. Right there in that sentence is an awful lot a church can set its sights on and grow - instead or arguing over whether to keep the kneelers or not, to put in pew cushions or not, or the new wall color, or renting space to the gay men’s community choir. Not in my church! Think of the children.
Every church has it own challenges and obstacles. Most of the time the hindrances are the people themselves. Growth comes from many avenues: good preaching, good music, a welcoming community, location, parking, energy level, comfortable space, social opportunities, service opportunity and consistency.
A church once asked me to give them ideas to help promote growth and I gave them a list of 18 activities that they could easily organize over the course of a year. They said “I don’t like that one.” “This one isn’t something that fits our community.” “We don’t want to attract those kind of people.” and “Who is going to do all this?” I told them that energy begets energy, that they must incorporate people of all generational, cultural, economic and educational levels into a comprehensive program and, even if they start small they will grow. They whittled the list down to three and then they didn’t even do those three. Survival of the fittest. Not to act is to act.
I think the church needs to be offering the community at least one activity or event each week. Even if the unchurched community is not interested in every topic, at least they will see that this church is active and vibrant and may decide to give it a chance.
I took a church with three services a weekend and after fifteen years we grew to five services and two of them were SRO. There was no one thing that promoted the growth rather a sinuous network of everything. Everything was comprehensive. We got rid of youth, teen and adult choirs and evolved to a family choir. The youth groups didn’t do their own youthy things but rather plugged into all the ministries of the community and church with the adults. Our music too became comprehensive and we did away with the folk group, the traditional choir and the praise band. We did all styles of music at every service and no group owned a particular service.
My suggestions for a church looking to grow are three things; Pastors, get out of your office. Jesus didn’t keep office hours. Get out and be with the people. Establish a beat like the old timey police officer. Regularly visit diners, bars, clubs, senior centers, nursing homes, jails, courts, be seen and heard. Approach people and be approachable and wear your collar. Don’t do it to drum up business, do it to comfort, heal, serve and welcome. Go to the mall, sit on one of the sofas in the hallway and put out a sign, “I will talk to anyone about anything.” Pass out your card for further ministering and don’t worry about your homily. If these things you do, the homily will take care of itself.
Hire a music director who does not worship music, one where music is not his ministry but someone who loves people and music is the vehicle to ministering to them. This person needs to spend time with the staff to come up with creative and diverse ideas and programs and know how to delegate lovingly and compassionately. The children of Israel were taken as slaves of the Babylonians and the musicians were forced to entertain their captors but they refused and hid their instruments in the trees by the river. The Babylonians said play or we will smash your babies against the rocks and they still refused. Likewise, a true music minister needs to know when to put down their instrument and minister. Their job isn’t an hour on Sunday morning. It begins when the service is over and ends the following Sunday when they pick up their instruments to worship - not entertain.
Finally, as I said before, lots and lots and lots and lots of events and activities. One activity can grow into something big. I once played weekly organ recitals at noon on a weekday. We started with about 20 people and after a year there were about 200 in attendance. They didn’t come for the music, they came because it was the place to be. My choir started bringing in refreshments. The parolees in the shelter next door came for the refreshments. A home for disabled adults started busing in residents to get them out of the facility. Homeless people came in out of the cold. The parolees began ushering at the door and cleaning up afterward. The homeless began passing out flyers in the community. Pastors, choir members and organists came to network. Brides came to scope out the building. A police officer came in regularly to chat with the parolees to see what he could do for them. Eventually the parolees started to use the building during the day for their AA and NA meetings. The place was a beehive of activity and people started visiting the church because - something was going on there. As the psalmist foretells in Psalm 66: Come and see what God has done: he is awesome in his deeds toward the children of man.
There is another thing, the church needs to give back to the community. It needs to do something that makes a difference. It needs to do several things that make a difference. People want to be part of something that makes a difference, not just sit in a pew and be entertained. When people visit or join the church, have ministries they can immediately plug into and I don’t mean things like altar guild, choir, usher or woman’s club. Things like working the food pantry, prison ministry, mission trips, gun buyback programs, homeless shelter, or do something revolutionary like Canada’s safe injection center (drug users can go there to shoot up without fear of arrest but medical care and counseling is provided in case something goes wrong. These centers have never had anyone die of an overdose while blocks away, people die from overdoses alone and unaided, hmmmph - do something revolutionary and save lives or not?), and, the church needs to tithe to some big program like California’s Housing Works program where they give houses to the homeless. Yup, GIVE. It gets them off the street and gives them stable shelter. A homeless person can cost your county about $20,000 a year in medical care alone because they lack shelter. With shelter and a place to secure a job from, they will be healthier. Dollar for dollar, homeless shelters are not cost effective on the whole and are only a band-aid. Check them out: housingworksca.org. Start one in your community.
Too bad the church can’t focus on some of these problems rather than worrying about growth and paying the bills. Pew people are not “customer acquisitions,” they are saints in the making. Too bad we don’t have institutions that fostered that growth and marshaled those forces. Oh, we do. It is called the DSS. They take care of the poor, the hungry, the homeless, the hopeless, the dying, the lonely, the abandoned, the imprisoned, the evicted, the illegal, the incurable, the different, the despised, the abused, the addicted, the forgotten, the neglected, the invisible, the battered and the frightened. Right there in that sentence is an awful lot a church can set its sights on and grow - instead or arguing over whether to keep the kneelers or not, to put in pew cushions or not, or the new wall color, or renting space to the gay men’s community choir. Not in my church! Think of the children.
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