Sunday, January 5, 2014

On the Twelth day of Christmas . . .

You may be thinking that I saved the worse for last.  Au contraire bon amie, you couldn't be more wrong.  Before you listen to this recording, keep in mind that this wonderful performance comes  from children in an inpatient music therapy program at a child psychiatric hospital.  These children range in age from 5 - 13 who stay there 24 hours a day for a period of one to three years. Children enter the program for treatment of a wide variety of developmental, suicidal and behavioral disorders and were considered a danger to themselves and others.   According to the director, the children normally have difficulty sitting still for more than five seconds at a stretch.  They learn everything by rote and repetition.  The director still hears from one of his saxophone players from the seventies who credits this program with saving his life every Christmas.

http://youtu.be/qe0pGm-lqs4

Another student, Angelo writes:  I went to CPH at U. of M. back in 1980-82 and was involved in the program. I played the drums, and other instuments. We play in the Jazz Band under Charlie & Ken.  While I was at CPH I learned the guitar were I slept (4th floor) and the drums on the 6th floor. You guys, if you ever read this, you have changed my life when you introduced music and I just want to say thanks for the time and patience you put into me and the other kids…keep up the good work! I am now 35 years old and have been married 12 years to my wife Shirley who supports my music 100%.  http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=51955841086&v=wall

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
1-800-273-8255
crisischat.org
congress.org

I hope these merry musical mishaps have inspired, entertained, or mildly frightened you.  At the very least, they serve to show that no matter how bleak your holiday season, it could always be worse.

Wishing you Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Epiphany, Happy Winter Solstice, and a  great New Year of peace, love and joy.  NOW, take down those trees and lights.  We've got a baptism coming up.

BUT WAIT, you're probably saying to yourself, Malcolm, on this twelve day journey to find a treasure of "stability," you never included the actual song "The Twelve Days of Christmas." If that is what you want, then follow this link to the amazing Straight, No Chaser:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2kYEK-pxs_A

Saturday, January 4, 2014

On The Eleventh day of Christmas . . .

Denizens of the dell, peripatetics of the pied-à-terre, outliers in the outskirts, natives of the neighborhood, occupants of Oz, wayfarers of Wall Street, other; We are in the home stretch.  There is but one post left in my draft folder.

My epiphany for today is that I don't think this guy is on the level.  Either way, I present "O Holy Night."   Music-Minus-One, thank you again.

http://youtu.be/53m_9MPuNww

To give equal holiday time to the atheists among us, I'm sure you all know the Zeitgeist Mithra, Horus, Jesus, Krishna, Attis, Dionysus argument.  Here is Charles Schultz's input. 
http://www.calamitiesofnature.com/archive/?c=470


-Malcolm.
Gîl síla na lû govaded

Friday, January 3, 2014

On The Tenth day of Christmas . . .

Who doesn't love a good laugh?  As we continue to percolate down the tangled corridor of twelve day madness, ineffably featured for your folly is this frenetically favorite, "Ukrainian Bell Carol."  Oh my. The best part of the song is the button.

http://youtu.be/nCKvIUAMg5A

So, uhm, like, you know, I mean, true story;  Three men die in a car accident Christmas Eve. They all find themselves at the pearly gates waiting to enter Heaven.  On entering they must present something relating or associated with Christmas.

The first man searches his pocket, and finds some Mistletoe, so he is allowed in.  The second man presents a candy cane, so he is also allowed in.  The third man pulls out a pair of stockings. Confused at this last gesture, St. Peter asks, "How do these represent Christmas?"

The third man replied, "They're Carol's."

Staying with the squirrel motif, DO NOT LET YOUR TEENAGE SON SEE THIS.  What is intriguing about this video is that it received half a million hits on this site and another half on YT.  It has been linked to over 2,800 times on FB.  WHERE ARE THEIR PARENTS?  If nothing else, you have to love the unashamed honesty of the film makers and their choice of Jane's Addiction.
http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=f5d_1172741350

I don't have a squirrel problem.  The cats next door catch and kill them as does my baby red tailed hawk.  I wish he'd eat some of the cats:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EzX2CftOUPI

-Malcolm.
Iyay avehay ayay igbay atapultcay.

"In a world gone mad with mistrust and alienation, the church (like never before) must present faith as a dynamic and relevant force for change."
-Wendell Berry.

Thursday, January 2, 2014

On The Ninth day of Christmas . . .

Blithe Thor's day, everyone.

You're probably asking yourself, I wonder what treasure will come crawling out of the primordial ooze today?   Do you 'memba Tiny Tim?  Keep the insulin handy for this one.  The Sulu recording was supposed to be part of yesterday's hit parade, for the Asian theme.  Who proof reads these things?!?  George Takei's family suffered horribly during WWII when our government shuffled them around internment camps.  The family lost everything.  Wait, the United States had internment camps?!?

http://youtu.be/P_vCzhpBTog

http://youtu.be/1ijO91N8jYY

Would you like to see a drunk squirrel?
http://www.metacafe.com/watch/1670028/drunk_squirrel/

-Malcolm.
clava thessara infinitas

Wednesday, January 1, 2014

On The Eighth day of Christmas . . .

. . . we get saddled with "O Come All Ye Faithful."  Someone got a hernia on this one.  Better put the cat out before you press play. 

http://youtu.be/gn2BEInqbu4

Bonus grandmotherly track: "Joy To the World."  It was either this song or the Feliz Navidad (but I think this one) that was created by a grandmother in Thailand.  It was her Xmas gift to her grandchildren who are living here in the US.  She mailed it a week prior and then as you know, a Tsunami hit her country either Christmas day or the day after (2007?).  The family never heard from her again.  I like to beleive that she took advantage of the chaos and left the country to assume a new identity.  How beautiful is this recording?

http://youtu.be/bgIVNSuSqbs

BTW, Eight maids a milking is a reference to smallpox vaccine.  However, Stephen Fry said "Nobody knows."

Happy New Year as we celebrate January named after Janus, the god of beginnings and transitions.  As the earth wobbles to its new precession, we are also approaching the age of Aquarius - in about 500 years.  Sadly, none of us will live to see this age of enlightenment known as the age of the water bearer.  The first recorded age was Taurus the bull which was ushered out by Moses who then introduced us to the age of the ram, Aries; Then Jesus, the age of Pieces the fish.  (Milutin Milankovitch, is it getting warm in here?)  Capricorn is in another 3,000 years, that's my symbol.  Then in roughly 5,000, Sagittarius.  That age won't be good.  Stock up on food now, people.  BTW, Noah ushered in the last Aquarian Age and we all know how that ended.

May your new year be blessed with peace, love and joy.  Remember, "If you are not busy being born again, then you are busy dying." - Siddhārtha Gautama (during the age of Aries).

-Malcolm.
Ki`banja`swei!

Tuesday, December 31, 2013

On The Seventh day of Christmas . . .

Knee-how shumdee (你好兄弟). I don't know how to spell that in English.

Yes kids, who doesn't love that perennial and ubiquitous recording of those wondrous dogs who bark out the tune of "Jingle Bells?"  Today's quite fab offering gives equal time to our four footed flea infested feline friends.   The phone ringing in the background is a nice surprise.  BTW, this recording was made in China.  Despite the cats singing in Chinese, I think you'll understand them.  Be not afraid, none of these cats fell victim to the Ford Sportka.  However, they are in China . . . Mmmm, cat, gurgle, drool (my Homer Simpson impersonation).

http://youtu.be/bNhjElUwJa8

Since this is technically the last day of the bird gifts, I thought this photo was apropos:
http://www.poddys.com/jokes/xmas_011.htm

-Malcolm.
Waíse heill!

Monday, December 30, 2013

On The Sixth day of Christmas . . .

. . . we meet Harold Rippy: Baby, What Kind of Christmas Tree You Want?

In my search for a smattering of well-known Christmas wackiness, I have unearthed a few obscure tunes.  The next time someone brags to you that their song is available on iTunes, tell them about Harold Rippy.  Ol' Harold has FIFTEEN albums online, and every one of them sounds pretty much like this toe-tapper from his smash album, "Christmas Specials." 

http://youtu.be/X69vR5_NTuE

***BONUS TRACK***

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oIEiIO-NreQ

From The Messiah; Honest, this has never happened to me before.  Every organist knows that this was a technical error due to forgetting the transpose button was on.  Here is another Christmas mishap thus answering the age old question:  Boxers or Briefs?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sAPKepDA50k

-Malcolm.
Unu bieron, mi petas

Have you ever wondered about the origins our our 12 Day song?  In the words of Stephen Fry, "Nobody knows."  It is most likely an offshoot of a song called "A New Dial."  I've heard in many homilies stating that it was written as a secret code written when one group of Jesus' followers had to hide their beliefs in order to avoid being tortured and killed by another group of Jesus' followers.  Of all the riches of Christianity to celebrate at the time of Jesus' birth, give or take six months, that doesn't sound like an outstandingly good one to spotlight.
A partridge in a pear tree - Jesus
Two turtle doves - The Old and New Testaments
Three French hens - The three kings bearing gifts
Four calling [sic] birds - The four Gospels
Five gold rings - Torah or Pentateuch, the first five books of the Old Testament
Six geese a-laying - The six days of Creation
Seven swans a-swimming - Seven gifts of the Holy Spirit
Eight maids a-milking - The eight Beatitudes
Nine ladies dancing - Nine fruits of the Holy Spirit
Ten lords a-leaping - The Ten Commandments
Eleven pipers piping - The eleven faithful Apostles
Twelve drummers drumming - The twelve points of the Apostles' Creed

Do you want to see 100 priests fighting over a building ravaged by rust and moth?  Too funny.  I bet my priest can take your priest.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=daO5MjwIW_E